Hunting Mouse: A lighthearted look at field service communications

Being in Field Service can have some interesting moments, particularly when working overseas and in countries where the English language might not be the first language. We are a department of personnel drawn from all over the world, so we each have our own take on English and the way to speak it. Add to this workers who speak a local dialect, and even communicating with each other can be confusing or comical, to say the least.  Read below for some lighthearted moments at field service projects around the world.

Sign Language
Field Service personnel often get by with sign language, drawings on the back of cigarette packets (a rarely used device these days as most of us have quit!) and by any means possible to get a point or question across. In some of the more frustrating conversations we resort to shouting the same question, as it would appear we think people can understand English by raising our voices.

On occasion we could be in a scene from a Monty Python Sketch–A reply to the question “Do we have no cutter wedges?” was met with a positive “yes” answer.  “So where are they then?”, “We have none.” It’s all very confusing, but the way the question was asked prompted the answer, so “Yes, we have no cutter wedges,” would appear to be correct when taken literally. A few years ago one of our guys (no names mentioned) was trying to explain to the waitress that we wanted one of those fancy Italian Ice Creams for dessert. Imitating holding the ice cream and moving it to his mouth several times didn’t go down too well, with a somewhat embarrassed waitress as I recall, but it was all taken in good humor (we got the ice cream by the way).

Lost in Translation
When we try to get smart and speak the local language the results are even worse…or better depending on your outlook. In Spain while ordering lunch, Macaroni with Tomato Sauce (Maccarones con tomate) came out as ‘Maricones con tomate’, which turned out to be ‘Gays with Tomatoes’…that brought more than a few smiles to the table and a bewildered look to the waiter’s face.  We still talk about it to this day.

During a lunchtime chat between three of our guys, two Americans and a Scottish guy, the topic of conversation came around to hunting. The two American guys mentioned that they had been hunting Moose somewhere in the USA a few years back and that they had needed special ammunition for the rifle. “Hunting Moose!” said the Scotsman in his strong dialect, with a confused look on his face, “Where I come from a Moose (dialect for a Mouse) is only 3 inches long!”

A few months ago we were working in China and came across this sign in Shanghai:

Walk downstairs and go backwards.

A sign in Shanghai. ‘Walk downstairs and go backwards’.

I did as instructed, went down the stairs, turned around and walked backwards… I couldn’t find the restroom or a Policeman??

So as you can see, communication in the field is important.  There is no need to shout. Be humble and respectful, and think about the question and the way to ask it–whatever country or situation you’re in.  Sometimes what you say or the sign language you use to get your message across can be misinterpreted, often with unexpected results.

As is often said: “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” And a final word of advice…be careful of any sign language you use, especially when asking for ice cream, more so if you’re in Italy, you’d probably end up with a slap there!!

Steve Chorley